Gentle Mindset Shifts for Mothers Who Are Struggling

February 18, 2026

Maternal Mental Health is Essential Care - By Stacy Cowart

Hello mamas,


My name is Stacy Cowart. I am a mother, a widow, and a life coach on my road of recovery and discovery. Getting my son and me to this point in life wasn’t exactly a walk in the park. During pregnancy, there were moments when I felt like I wasn’t meant to be a mother in this life. Months after giving birth, I had thoughts of running away, leaving my son with his father, believing they would be better off without me.


Then, four years ago, we lost his father — my soulmate — to cancer. In that moment, I knew I had to take a long, honest look at my mental health in order to survive and show up as a single mother.


Motherhood is often portrayed as joyful, instinctual, and fulfilling — but the truth is, for many of us, it can also be disorienting, exhausting, lonely, and emotionally overwhelming. For many new mothers, especially those navigating medical complications, NICU stays, or traumatic births, the internal pressure to “do it right” can quietly erode mental health.


For others, like me, it was more than that. It was a feeling I couldn’t quite put my finger on — a twist of regret, uncertainty about becoming a mother, and a slow, steady build of darkness.


Maternal mental health struggles are not a personal failure — and they are not something to take lightly. They are a nervous system response to massive physical, emotional, hormonal, and identity changes.


During my own postpartum journey, following an emergency C-section, I struggled silently and coped in unhealthy ways for years. What I learned — and what I want other mothers to know — is that talking about your feelings matters. Ignoring emotions doesn’t make them disappear.


Support groups, peer communities, and organizations like Miracle Babies exist to remind families that they do not have to carry this alone.


And mindset matters more than ever.


Below are gentle mindset shifts and simple habits to support mothers navigating this tender season. There is no right or wrong way to grow. Healing is a journey — and it cannot be rushed.


1. Reject the “Perfect Mother” Myth


Perfection is not only impossible — it’s harmful.

The idea that a “good mother” is always patient, calm, productive, and grateful sets an unrealistic standard no human can meet. Instead, aim to be a “good enough” mother.


Good enough means:

  • You show up, even imperfectly
  • You repair when you lose patience
  • You keep going on hard days

Children don’t need perfection. They need presence, safety, and love.


Mindset shifts:

  • “I don’t need to do this perfectly to be a good mother.”
  • “I am enough just as I am right now.”


2. Practice Self-Compassion (Not Self-Criticism)


Many mothers speak to themselves in ways they would never speak to anyone else.

If your inner voice is harsh or demanding, pause and ask:


What would I say to a friend who felt this way?

That critical voice isn’t truth — it’s fear. It doesn’t deserve to lead.

Self-compassion doesn’t mean lowering your standards; it means offering yourself the same grace you give others. One affirmation I return to often is:
“I am the love of my life.”

Motherhood is powerful. Creating life is powerful. You deserve care, too.


Try this reframe:

  • Instead of: “I should be doing more.”
  • Say: “I am doing the best I can with the resources I have today.”


This shift alone can reduce shame and emotional burnout.

As Carl Jung said, “Shame is a soul-eating emotion.” There should never be shame in asking for help.


3. Reframe “Self-Care” as “Maintenance”


For many mothers, self-care feels selfish or unrealistic — especially when caring for a newborn or navigating medical stress.

But basic care is not indulgent. It’s essential.

For me, even five to ten minutes in the morning — sitting on a mat, breathing deeply, listening to a guided meditation — changed everything. It helped me access gratitude and begin a journey toward self-love.


Think of your body and mind like a vehicle:


  • Food is fuel
  • Sleep is restoration
  • Hygiene is regulation


Without maintenance, things break down.


Caring for yourself isn’t something you earn after caring for everyone else — it’s what allows you to care for your child safely and sustainably.


4. The One-Thing Rule: Shrinking Overwhelm


When everything feels urgent and heavy, your nervous system can shut down.

Instead of asking, “How do I do all of this?”


Ask:

“What is the one thing I need to do in the next 10 minutes?”

That’s it. One small step.


  • Drink water
  • Change the baby
  • Sit down
  • Breathe


Momentum returns when overwhelm becomes manageable.

Simple Daily Habits for Mental Health Support


These are not “to-do’s.” They are anchors.

  • Morning grounding: three slow breaths before checking your phone
  • Nourishment check: eat something every few hours
  • Body awareness: notice tension and soften your shoulders
  • Connection: one honest message to someone safe each day
  • Permission to rest: even five minutes counts


Small, consistent care regulates the nervous system more than big, occasional efforts.

Listen to your body. Trauma often shows up physically — clenched jaws, tight hips, shallow breathing. Awareness is the first step toward release.


A Gentle Reminder


Struggling does not mean you are failing.

It means you are human in a season that asks a lot.

You are allowed to need support.
You are allowed to ask for help.
You are allowed to care for yourself, too.

Maternal mental health matters — because you matter.
And you are not alone.


If you would like to connect with Stacy, a Certified Life Coach through Jay Shetty, you can contact her via email at feeltoheal222@gmail.com or via Instagram @stacysjourney222


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